Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Night Run To Belgium...

One of my favorite things about living here is that I can wake up one Friday morning, like last week, and say to myself, "I'm going to Belgium in 24hours", just because. In Wisconsin that phrase would substitute another country with some mundane task like... mowing... or milking cows. At best, I'd be going to a restaurant that did not serve omelets and lacked the word "Family" in the title. Now and again, I'd throw a concert into the mix... but I never went to another country just to see a show.

But times, they are a'changin' and I piled into a car with my hubs & friends to see Phoenix, one of the best bands of all time. I'd been to visit our neighbors to north before, so I had some idea of what I was getting into, I'll break it down for you...

Obligatory Belgium Process:

- Make fun of the accent for a good hour in the car. If you're untalented in the accent department (eh hhem.. yours truly) you can perform what we like to call "Le Mélange" (the mix). It's a combination between the Canadian, American and Belgian accents rolled into one. An accent taco, mmm, délicieux!

- Upon arrival, check in, drop off your stuff at the hotel and proceed IMMEDIATELY to the nearest bar for mass consumption of beer.

- When you're full of liquid deliciousness, head to the nearest restaurant and get yourselves a GIANT POT of mussels and a few cones of fries. MMM, the M-F'er treatment (Moules & Frites!). It's fine. Everyone will reek of garlic sauce, so no one will notice that your breath can anesthetize small children.


- Go see the famous peeing boy statue. (A must... only in Belgium can a statue be famous because it's peeing.) Take your picture next to it, preferably pretending to drink the pee. Everyone does it.

- Feast your eyes on Musé de Marguerite's many many naked images and oddball phrases. (this will be especially funny being that you'll be totally hammered after your liquid excursions. ie: "Poetry is a pipe" => in french meaning "Poetry is a blow job". Priceless.)


- Go see an amazing Phoenix concert if you can.

- Beer Dinner.

- Sleep.

- Repeat.

M'Fing awesome.

6 comments:

  1. LOL.

    And there you go. Belgium in a nutshell. Or mussel shell. Or bottom of a beer mug, lol.

    Never been. Now I will have to go. Wonder if they have any gluten-free beer there, yet?

    Ahhhhh! I should have known why you are so fun to hang around, you are from Wiscahhhhnsin (speaking of making fun of accents :-) ). I was born in the Cheese State, but managed to make my escape at the tender age of six. Actually, I have very fond memories of summers visiting the grandparents. Good ole Wiscahhhhhnsin.

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  2. Shut up! A fellow wisco in our midst!! At least you don't say WESconsin... hate that. I doubt BE has anything gluten free, their mussels probably have gluten. I know how annoying that can be though, one of my colleagues can't eat it either so I've started bringing in non-gluten snacks now :)

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  3. I totally appreciate how in only 2 hours (plane/train) it's possible to be in a different country with a different language and culture (and food & drink...mmm).

    Compare:

    Expat - "in 2 hours we'll be in Brussels, sipping some Hoegaarden/Leffe/[insert other local brand] and stuffing ourselves with des frites! Chics alors!"

    Cheesehead -- "in 2 hours, we'll be touching down at Cleveland Hopkins International Airport. Neat. Ohio. Um, yeah. Cleveland rocks?"

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  4. I am so SO jealous! It's on the top of my bucket list to one day make a pilgrimage to Chimay Abbey and drink as much of their beer as is humanly possible. I would then, of course, follow it with a trip to lovely Bruges. *sigh* Someday... Someday...

    (For now I'll have to content myself with cows.)

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  5. @Yessica: What??!! I LOVE OHIO! Oh wait, no. I just love to SAY "Ohio"...OoohhiIIIIIiooOOOOooo...

    @Sara: Belgium is at the top of your list? Yeah the beer's pretty good, but it's also not too damn shabby at the Great Dane in Madison! No need to go all the way to Belgium for a bit of the froth. Bruges is nice though... but you can do that in about 2hrs time. I've got It'ly at the top of my list!

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  6. Never been to France, but I do hope to do the whole "Europe Thing" some day. It's on my bucket list. Sounds like you had a blast though.

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