Friday, December 11, 2009

Thanks Giving, the holiday no one understands.


Thanksgiving post comin' at you a bit late.

I've tried explaining this, but some how I get the impression it's just not sinking in.

Frog 1: "Is it a religious holiday?"

Me: "Nope."

Frog 2: "Is it to replace Christmas for atheists?"

Me: "Not even close."

Frog 3: "Is it just because you are all fat and want to eat?"

Me: "DING DING DING DING!!!!"

Honestly, what is the point of this holiday other than to stuff ourselves and take post-turkey-inhaled-naps? Oh oh, right...the pilgrims. Yes, yes. Because we all care so deeply about that. Come on, like I can explain this to the French without laughing...

"We're celebrating the collaboration between the native Americans and pilgrims during the winter season so that the pilgrims wouldn't all starve to death."


They're French. You do realize what they're going to say to me if I lay this pearl of wisdom on them?

"Oh. So zey saved you from ze starvations, and you sank zem by killing zem all and stealing ze lands? And zen, you make ze holidays because of ziss?"


My french family had some difficulty understanding it, and I don't blame them. It really makes no sense at all. It's like the German's having a Holocaust holiday. Being the wonderful human beings my french fam are, they try to make me feel like a little bit of home is here, and we have celebrated turkey day for years together.

On the whole, it's wonderful. We eat the classics, but there was one variation I'm not so sure of. The whole... turkey... stuffed with ham... part. Apparently all stuffing here has some kind of meat in it. I think ours had a flavor somewhere between liver and ass. Double meat = not a good idea in this case. I've dubbed it the Tamkey. Next year I'm suggesting that the meat-stuffing of choice be hamburgers. And everyone, including grampa, must wear a plaid cowboy hats at the table. (see illustration.)


















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